formal was the most amazing night of my life!!!!!!!!!!!! like you have no idea! [: it was non-stop partying from 12-12 haha the after party was the best part though. sitting on the roof looking up at the stars with my baby was amazing.
formal [: February 2, 2010
Yay!! My winter formal is this friday and i can’t wait! i just hope i’m not sick because i’m sick right now and that would suck if i was still sick on formal. ]: hehe but yayy i cannot wait!!!
Death. January 17, 2010
everyone dies at some point right? i just never thought two family members, both under the age of 23, could die in the same week and by the same way. my 22 year old cousin decided to end her life at the age of 22 on her birthday. know one understood why she did it though because she was the happiest, positive, person anyone has ever met. on the day of her funeral, her boyfriend found a note she had left in his room. it explained why she killed herself. she killed herself because her ex was abusing her and threatened to kill her current boyfriend if she ever told. she explained how it had been going on for 3 years now and she just couldn’t take it anymore. she didn’t want him to hurt her boyfriend, the love of her life. i will miss you katherine. now, my other cousin, he’s a totally different story. he loves guns and he knows how to properly use them. well he was cleaning out his gun with one of his friends out in his backyard(he lives in texas) when he held up the gun to his head and said “isn’t it stupid how people play russian roulette?” and just like that, it went off. a total accident. he was engaged and had a baby on the way. i will miss you steven. death, is a part of life. no matter how much you may hate it, death will come.
forever and always in our hearts, R.I.P. katherine ehat and steven lahey <3
I miss you… January 15, 2010
Why did you have to die on me? You were so young… only 22 years old. You had your whole life ahead of you. I’m sorry that you decided to end your life like this. But why on your birthday? Why today? Why did you do it? You were so happy and free. I will always love you and remember you always. I LOVE YOU KATHERINE!
R.I.P. Katherine Ehat <3
January 14, 2010
My life is like a time bomb just waiting to explode. I keep waiting for something big or exciting to happen like the end of the world, but it never happens. instead, my life s is like a never ending roller coaster. It just keeps going up and down, up and down, never ending. The roller coaster hasn’t always been in my life though. It only started in the eighth grade with my first love. Now I know I talk about my first love a lot, but it’s all I can think about. I don’t understand why all my thoughts are based on him when he broke my heart over, and over again. I mean why should I even care for him when he left my heart cut open, never coming back to sew it back up for me? Am I crazy? Am I stupid for thinking that he still cares about me? Am I just plain retarded for hoping that he still remembers what we had and what we did together? But the biggest question that I know is in my heart but just can’t come out is: Am I wrong to believe that he still loves me even though I know in my heart of hearts, that he doesn’t? These are the questions I ask myself over and over again in my head every time i catch a glimpse of him at a football game, or whenever I see him. All my friends say that I need to get over him and that he is a jerk for using me like a tissue. They say that I’m just a tissue box to him. He only needs me when he is sick or hurting. I sometimes catch myself telling my heart that everyone needs tissues, that if the world didn’t have tissues, then there would be nothing to catch the tears and sorrow that falls from our eyes. But then I think, is it bad to be a tissue? Is it wrong for him to think that I’m only a tissue for him to cry on when he’s sad or lonely? After fours of asking myself that, the answer is finally yes. As much as it hurts me to say it, all my friends are right. I do know that ar one point he did love me, but for right now I’m just a tissue to him. Only there when he needs it the most. And I will be there, just as a friend who hands him the tissue.
wow January 10, 2010
i love how confused i am right now. i don’t understand whats going on. i mean i have nothing against you i don’t even talk about you i just need a break from all the drama so i can focus on my life and my school work. now i know that sounds like total bullshit but it’s true. if you don’t believe me then that’s fine. i don’t mean to give you dirty looks, i don’t go off and tell my friends how pissed i am at you, and i’m not afraid to talk to you to your face. i was mad that you did what you did but it’s whatever. i’m sorry if you don’t know what you did but i do and it kinda hurt. just a lil. so you don’t have to give ME dirty looks or go off and tell your friends how much of a bitch I am. i’m sorry if i look at you or stare at you when i know your talking about me. force of habbit. sorry but i’m not gonna sit here and watch you turn some of my friends against me.
RUMORS=HURT January 6, 2010
Do people understand that rumors hurt? Do they understand that people kill themselves because of them? And do they realize that it kills them inside everyday? Well they don’t. I HATE RUMORS. This is the FOURTH time this school year that someone has started a stupid rumor about me. On the first day back from break too! I mean really? This one was so hurtful that it made me run to the bathroom and cry. People just don’t realize how much it hurts. Great way to start the new year out, huh. Well happy 2010 to me…
Family December 20, 2009
Family is everything to me. Without them, I wouldn’t be who I am today. They lift me up when I’m feeling down. They have my back no matter how many guys hurt me. They are always there for me. Although they make fun of me and tease me, I know that they do it out of love. Like for example, last night. Last night was my grandpa’s annual Christmas party. My family had found out about my boyfriend and wanted to make sure he was good enough for me. Now you have to understand that all 50 of my family members on my mom’s side were there. So they called him up and each asked him one question. In case your stupid and can’t do the math, that’s 50 questions for the poor guy. I felt so bad for him because they were asking him really embarrassing questions and they told him that if he ever hurt me, then they would go over to his house, watch him sleep, then chop off his balls, and hang them over his head so he would never be able to forget what he did to me. Yup! That’s family for ya! I love them no matter how crazy they are. If you haven’t told your family “I love you” in the past hour, then I suggest that you get off your lazy ass and tell them because you never know if your “I love you” will be your last.
<3 family
guys December 1, 2009
guys are the most stupidest thing on this planet. some are nice others are rotten. right now i just hate them all. its like there out to get me or something. everywhere i turn there’s a guy around the corner saying he’s “in love with me.” i mean come on, really?
